Getting married is one of the most beautiful things that can happen to two people in love. Aside from sealing the deal to forever, it is also one way for both parties; family and friends from both groom and bride’s side, to gather in one venue and get to know each other. But preparing for a wedding, be it small or big. is not without hurdles. There are a few problems a couple will likely encounter while planning and preparing for the start of their happily ever after.
Parent’s requests.
This is perhaps the most common problem engaged couple are facing. Parents, especially among Filipino families, usually give advice, which sometimes becomes request, to the couple of the things they prefer. From asking to invite their (parents) friends you do not even know, to the venue of the reception, food choices and even traditions; these are the example of things often raised by parents to their children who are planning their wedding.Addressing this issue may not be very easy but not impossible either. Talk to your parents calmly and explain to them why what they want is not possible at the moment. Sometimes, parents just get too excited for your big day that they tend to forget that it’s your big day and no longer for them to decide.
Inviting the whole tribe.
This is usually connected to number one above. Some Filipino families can be so clannish that they find joy in inviting every relative up to the nth degree. The parents and other elders (grandparents) would usually ask to invite distant relatives and when you don’t, they’d feel bad and make you feel guilty about it. Good for you if the relatives are understanding enough so as not to get slighted when they are not invited. Unfortunately, there are relatives who will take it against you if you did not include them in the celebration. If your folks insist on inviting the whole tribe and you aim for an intimate wedding, explain why you prefer that route. Though you necessarily don’t need to do it since it is your day, do so out of respect for them. If budget is what holds you back from having that big crowd, tell your parents that your budget is limited and if they really want to have everyone around, then they can pick up the tab.
Suppliers/coordinators not living up to expectations.
This is every bridezilla’s nightmare. You have been dreaming of a perfect wedding for years and when the awaited time has come, the possibility of achieving that long time dream is threatened due to the chosen suppliers. If the supplier is hard to get in touch with or your ideas simply don’t jive, it is best that you look for other options. Before booking and giving your down payment, talk things out thoroughly, be open about your expectations and better put everything into writing so in case they put you into uncertain situation, you can easily run after them, or they cannot run from you that easy.
No RSVP.
“RSVP” in the invitation is placed for a reason. It is not there just because you wanted to since other wedding invitations you got had it too. It is for the couple to determine the number of guests so that they can make appropriate preparations. To encourage guests to confirm attendance, say something like “assigned table/seat will be given after confirmation of attendance” and though may sound blunt you can say “those who fail to confirm attendance on (date) will be taken off the guest list”.
Everyone wants to be in the entourage.
Cousin A wants to be one of the secondary sponsors, cousin B wants to be a bridesmaid, Aunt A wants teenage daughter to be a junior bridesmaid, mom wants friend to be principal sponsor, and the list goes on. If you are not that close to them or for some reason you don’t fancy having them as part of your entourage, then don’t. Remember, wedding day is more fun when you are with the people you are comfortable to be with.
Lucky is a bride (and groom!) who is not facing these common problems. But if you find yourself caught in any of this situation, just take a deep breath and think of the reason of all of these – and that is to marry the person you love the most. Address the issues in calm and professional manner to avoid further conflicts
Have you encountered any problem while preparing for your wedding day? We’d love to hear about how your overcome it. 🙂